No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Randomize
