So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
Randomize
