I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Holy shit dude........stairs
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
