i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
