Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Houston, we have a blender
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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