she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Randomize
