I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
Randomize
