You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize