I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize
