i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
Randomize
