I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
