im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
COCAINE IS GR8
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