im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
Randomize