is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
