It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
You are a genius and a whore.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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