rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
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