is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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