I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
