he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
porn star boner night. come get it.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
