It's like a parade of train wrecks.
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
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Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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