Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Have you finally orgasmed yet?
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
