no, he came in my armpit
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
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