nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Randomize
