eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
You smell like stripper and shame
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
