go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
