I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I hope mine doesn't look like that
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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