I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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