Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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