franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
A bitchslap is in order.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Randomize
