yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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