we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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