did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Randomize
