what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
Congratulations! We have a period
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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