What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
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