a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
