no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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