Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Banned from zoo.
Again?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
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