are you still at the devil's house?
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
it's great music for shaving your balls
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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