My nipple is on Facebook.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
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