tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize