I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
Randomize
