After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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