Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
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