i wish peter jackson would direct porn
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
she told me id be a great addition to their lesbian community and shes giving me sex eyes from across the room. come get me NOW
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