hell yes lets make some ravioli
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize
