Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
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