at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
