i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
