I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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