are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize